Shifting from compulsive validation-seeking to authentic, secure relational attachment.
Unlike substance dependencies, intimacy-based compulsions cannot be resolved by simple, lifelong avoidance. Love addiction, romantic obsession, and compulsive sexual behaviours are not expressions of high libido or "poor choices" — they are deep-rooted attachment strategies. When an individual uses romantic fantasy, pornography, or compulsive sexual encounters to escape reality, they are attempting to fill a profound void left by early emotional neglect, abandonment, or relational boundary violations.
In-person sessions in Fitzrovia (W1W) and Bromley (BR1), plus online therapy across the UK.
Love and sex addiction are frequently the outward symptoms of underlying functional codependency — learned patterns of relating that took root long before the compulsive behaviour began.
You may find yourself obsessively chasing a partner's validation, losing your identity in relationships, or tolerating toxic behaviour out of an agonising fear of abandonment.
The belief driving this: "If they leave, I will not survive."
Alternatively, you might use brief, intense sexual or romantic encounters to experience temporary closeness, only to immediately pull away or detach when genuine vulnerability is required.
The belief driving this: "If they truly see me, they will reject me."
Neither pattern is a character flaw. Both are survival strategies learned in response to early relational pain — and both can be unlearned.
Schedule Your Free 15-Minute ConsultationTrue freedom from intimacy-based compulsions comes from learning how to build a healthy relationship with yourself first. Utilising the highly structured Post-Induction Therapy framework, our clinical approach focuses on three core areas:
Learning where you end and another person begins, allowing you to protect your own emotional energy without guilt or fear.
Safely addressing the early relational wounds that convinced you that love must be earned through performance, rescue, or self-sacrifice.
Resolving the toxic shame that tells you that you are fundamentally unlovable as you are — replacing it with earned self-worth.
I'm Richard Lee, a BACP Accredited therapist with specialist Post-Induction Therapy (PIT) training — the model developed by Pia Mellody specifically for codependency and developmental trauma. My approach is relational, trauma-informed, and entirely confidential.
Sessions are £95 per 50-minute clinical hour. We invite you to book a free 15-minute introductory telephone call to discuss your situation with no obligation.